NASA Confirms Earth is Flat, Blames Google Maps for Decades of Deception
![NASA And Google In Space On Top Of Earth ~ [Satellite Image From James Webb] And The Paper Rocket Watermark Under.](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!h7Gy!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Faf679800-c52a-4855-9ce4-a3c2f1d18339_2920x1643.png "NASA And Google In Space On Top Of Earth ~ [Satellite Image From James Webb] And The Paper Rocket Watermark Under.")
WASHINGTON— NASA has confirmed that the Earth is flat, sending shockwaves across the globe. The agency blames Google Maps for perpetuating the false notion of a spherical Earth for decades.
The discovery was made possible by a team of researchers who analyzed Google's satellite imaging fleet, specifically the "Fisheye-XL" lens system. While intended to provide a wider field of view, it had a rather...roundabout way of distorting reality. The researchers found that the lens was introducing a significant curvature distortion, making the Earth appear rounder than it actually is. In other words, Google's attempt to get a wider view ended up giving us a warped perspective.
"We applied a corrective orthorectification to the Google satellite imagery, which revealed the Earth's true shape," said Dr. John Taylor, lead researcher on the NASA project. "It was a 'eureka' moment, really. I mean, who uses a fisheye lens to map the planet?"
The news has prompted an international debate about the reliability of technology and the extent to which we've been misled. Many people are now questioning their trust in Google, with some even switching from Gmail to Yahoo in protest.
Flat Earth societies worldwide are celebrating the announcement as a long overdue validation of their beliefs. "We told you so," said a flat Earth advocate with a smug smile. "we're not crazy, we're just ahead of the curve."
"We were unaware that the lens provided by Sony was actually a fisheye lens," said a Google spokesperson. "They assured us it was their 'GeoOptix HDX' lens with Panoramic Enhancement Technology (PET), designed for high-resolution satellite imaging. We were led to believe it would enhance the Earth's visual appeal."
As the world grapples with this new reality, many are left to ponder the deeper implications. What other spherical deceptions lie in wait? Is the moon next? And most importantly, how will this affect GPS navigation?As we navigate this uncharted territory, it's time to question what other truths might be hiding in plain sight – or, rather, on our newly level horizon!
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